Valentine’s Day… What’s that?
I have been staring at this for about 5 minutes racking my brain as to what I will write and go on and on about but then, it hit me: Nothing happened today. Nothing, zero, zilch, zip, nada. Not that I was expecting anything because I just think Valentine’s Day is one big excuse. Excuse for a lot of lovey-dovey and romantic things I could take note of but I am too lazy to do so, so you can all just supply your versions here. Maybe I can’t appreciate Valentine’s day for what it really is, now, because no one wasted effort to actually make me feel loved or more accurately, I have no one special. Sad life, yes? But I don’t want your pity. I revel in my loneliness. Not because “God is writing the perfect love story for me.” but because I have no love story. Period. That’s not something I’m ashamed nor proud of, it’s just something about me. Nothing special.
Moving on, today had me feeling all messed up. This day was just frustrating and all over the place. This day would probably be irrelevant right about… Now. There wasn’t a definite mood and I was just feeling so down. There was a point when I just wanted to not give a fuck anymore and just quit, altogether but apparently, my whole system did not agree with me because apparently again, I had more fucks to give. WHAT THE HELL. It was out of my control, really. I understand that things don’t go your way always, I’m not complaining… I’m just stating that this day was a pathetic excuse for a LOVE day. Meh.
But I really appreciated what Jan did (BEST BESTFRIEND EVER!!!), she actually gave me a rose and a little not inside it. Artificial or whatever, she made the effort and I love her for that. Thank youuuu, J! You da best.
Then, I come home to my absolute favorite band tweeting about heading to the Philippines already. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT HURTS?!!!! IT’S LIKE SOMEONE RIPPED YOUR HEART OUT AND STARTED EATING IT IN FRONT OF YOU (dramatic). I WILL NOT BE ABLE TO SEE THEM LIVE GOD DAMN IT. THAT IS SUCH A SHAME FOR A FANGIRL LIKE ME. NO OFFENSE TO THE PEOPLE FROM MANILA BUT FUCK YOU, MNL. FUCK YOU SO MUCH! CEBU IS JUST AS GREAT, YOU KNOW!!!! What good are chocolates and flowers when I can’t even see them live? KILL ME NOW. Can I just die? This is just pure torture. I know that it’s shallow but please, let this slide. Just this once.
All in all, I’m glad that tomorrow is just a day. Just a Wednesday, to me. Nothing special. I expected nothing yet the hope still lingers there and I just really wish for it to go away. :|
